Poem

Getting into this now...........

One of the problems with getting old is the temptation to romantisise the past - 'the good old days...'etc.
Ten years ago, after my marriage fell apart, quite out of the blue, an old lover came back into my life. This turned into a torrid, long-distance affaire which lasted a while and then died (as is usually the case).
Here is my one and only 'poem' which fell out of me in about 10 minutes flat and which I am equally proud of and embarrassed by:

HISTORY

she saw me at the club, singing
then I was standing at the bar
and she talked to me
‘like your songs’
I wasn’t listening
just polite
it was a fan thing.


I went to the place where she was
not to see HER
not to see anyone
just to BE there
but she thought so and came to me
the shy one, just divorced.
strange, I didn’t know her
but nice to be chatted by a pretty young one.
so we drank and danced
I kissed her – how bold!
and bolder still I tried more
she would have
but her clothes wouldn’t
and that was that :
the start of it all.


a strange affaire
out with the lads
what lads?
drink
dance
kiss
then drive into the night
naked in the back seat
sex and adrenalin.
then her to home and me to mine
and always to someone else
‘had a nice time dear?’
through all this she loved me
really
I loved something
but never sure.




she went away
to ease the hurt of never being
the one at home
but she stayed in my mind
always.
there was sex
but never like with her
so, bereft, I followed her
but never to stay
and visits end
but the hurt grew
so she went away again
hidden.


many years passed
many thoughts of a stupid man
and her beautiful eyes.
love grew in me
too late
much too late.


then when life was too cruel
too much hurt
I cried out
and she heard
so strong.
somehow she found me
took the hurt away
and put love there
forever.


PAST


a polite enquiry
unleashes years of
hidden dreams.
heart on sleeve
he writes back
and waits
disbelieving all the signs
but hoping.





neither can believe it
more letters
less awkward
a telephone call
such apprehension
her voice after all the years
brings joy to his heart.


he goes to her
brighton pier.
he waits
late?
no
there!
time slows
look
hug
hard beach
soft mouth
walking
holding
touching
kisses in a crowded room
oblivious
joy
love.
one day
a jewel among days

they write
talk
love grows
missing
aching
longing.


she goes to him
sunny devon
to find out
about them.
sleeping entwined
waking
touching
holding
strawberry kisses
loving
lovers.

PRESENT


he is changed
a nicer man.
love rules ok
relaxed now
write
talk
love
and being
loved.

happiness.